“So if you get blue flavor of ice cream, it’ll be pretty bland, promising a lot more than it can deliver.”

“It looks pretty dumb,” said John. “What about the red flavor?”

“If you get red flavor, the cursed flavor fiend slurps your essence,” the employee said. “Kid’s size, you’ll survive. Small, you’ll be bedridden for a week. Medium, you’ll be out a month and probably lose a limb. Large, and we’ll have to charge you an extra fee to move your lifeless husk out of the way.”

“You’re gonna get the blue flavor, right?” Joan said.

“I dunno,” said John. “I’m kinda 50-50. It’s a dead heat.”

“But the guy literally just said that the blue flavor is disappointing and the red one will kill you. You can’t get the red.”

“Nobody tells me what I can and can’t do,” John snapped. “I’m sure it’s just an exaggeration.”

“Do you really wanna find out?” said Joan.

“I’m not undecided any longer,” John said. “I’ll take the red.”

“Very good, sir. What size?”

“Large, of course!”

  • Like what you see? Purchase a print or ebook version!