“Yeah?” said the troll. “Whaddaya want?”

“Hello, friend,” said Leroy, reaching out to shake the oozing, scabrous hand of the green horror from beneath. “My name is John Leroy Jay, but you can call me Leroy. I was wondering if you had a moment to talk about the marvelous product I have for sale.”

The troll regarded him with baleful, rheumy eyes. “Ain’t got nothin’ I need,” it mumbled. “Ain’t got nothin’ to pay with either.”

“But my friend! These selfie sticks have a million and one uses around the home and office! No troll in your position can afford to be without one!”

“Howzat?”

“Well, you can use them as a back scratcher for one,” said Leroy with a glance at the troll’s boil-ridden backside. “It folds up nice but is whip strong, so you can hide it and then extend for a good smack on your enemies. And forget about dropping anything in a pond–the selfie sticks have got all your fishing-out needs in the bag!”

“And what’s I gonna pay wit?” grunted the troll.

“Easy!” grinned Leroy. “Just give me that glowing sword you’ve got there.”

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