Originally aired July 17, 1977.

The HOST stands in front of an old HOUSE, surrounded by scaffolding. Jaunty disco music plays over the THIS GROOVY PAD logo as the program returns from commercial.

HOST: Groovy! Welcome back to This Groovy Pad American Home Renovation, where we’re jazzing up this hoary old 1870s house with some serious disco style!

The HOST walks past an OPEN FLAME in the backyard, onto which HUNDRED-YEAR-OLD HARDWOOD is being thrown.

HOST: Now, we had stained hardwood floors in the front room and in the kitchen, and that is just too old-fashioned, yuck! So we’re tearing it all up, and burning it in the backyard trash pile.

The HOST leads the camera into the HOUSE, where WORKMEN are finishing up tacking down THICK SHAG CARPET.

HOST: In its place, nice new shag carpet is going into the front room, in cool, timeless, lime green.

The camera follows the HOST into the KITCHEN, where fresh plastic LINOLEUM is being buffed. A LIME GREEN REFRIGERATOR sits in one corner, while an ORANGE COFFEE MAKER and a BEIGE OVEN are nearby.

HOST: In the kitchen, we’ve just finished installing a full linoleum floor, which will really go well with our new orange, beige, and green appliances.

Walking UPSTAIRS, the HOST points out the walls of the MASTER BEDROOM, which are covered with PRESSWOOD PANELS.

HOST: Once again, we’ve beautified this room up to modern standards. This all used to be pristine wallpaper from the 1910s, now we’ve torn that up and replaced it all with faux wood paneling for a fresh, chic, modern look.

Descending to the FINISHED BASEMENT, the HOST points at the OFF-WHITE CEILING before running a hand over the GREEN BRICK WALL.

HOST: Finally, the basement here originally had an embossed cast-iron ceiling and natural brickwork. Ew! Eww! We’ve dropped the ceiling and installed fluorescent lights for starters, and we’ve also given these ugly naked bricks a rich coat of olive green.

Back OUTSIDE, the HOST gestures toward the HOUSE.

HOST: With the renovations nearly complete, we’ve timelessly updated this creaky old place for the modern era!

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