An Important Message from Ms. Green’s 3rd Grade Homeroom, Deerton Elementary School

Did you know that one billion percent of all school kids are at risk from a common infection? It’s good at math, because it adds to our trouble, subtracts from our fun, divides us up, and multiplies like crazy. But a lot of kids don’t get shots for it because of the anti-shot people, who say the shots can give you farts and make you fail your tests.

But COOTIES are real and you need to get your shots.

Remember to get your cootie shots from a nice kid. Listen for what they say. If they say “Circle, circle, dot, dot, now you’ve got the cootie shot!” they are a nice kid and you’ll be safe from cooties for at least a day. If they say Circle, circle, square, square, now you have it everywhere!” they are a bad kid and they just gave you extra cooties just to be mean. You should find someone else to give you a shot quick or you might give them to everybody.

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