GesteCo LLC PleasureCenter™ Operations Note
Use of the PleasureCenter™ device for more than 5 minutes is STRONGLY countraindicated. Any alteration of the hard-coded 5-minute time limit will void the GesteCo limited warranty and open the individual to prosecution under the Abuse of Pleasure Act § 10. Doing so despite posted warnings serves to absolve GesteCo LLC and PleasureCenter™ distributors of any and all liability in perpetuity throughout the universe.
Extended use of the PleasureCenter™ may cause the following side effects:
– “burnout” of pleasure centers in the human brain, leading to the inability to feel pleasure without a PleasureCenter™ ever again
– cerebral hemorrhage
– “hyperactivation” of pleasure centers in the human brain, leading to a state of constant bliss until death through coronary failure
– hysteria
– homicide
– violent involuntary spasms
– violent voluntary spasms
– atheism
– theism
– myocardial infarction
– coma
– death
– resurrection
Please use your PleasureCenter™ only within acceptable means and limits.
Inspired by the song ‘5 minutes pleasure’ by Hiroki Kikuta, released under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International license.
Excerpts From Nonexistent Books 
November 17, 2015 at 11:50 am
Abuse of Pleasure Act § 10. I remember that one bogged up the House for months with all the filibusters and useless, symbolic votes for repeal.
November 17, 2015 at 3:02 pm
What they failed to realize was that anyone who would willingly serve in the House must derive virtually all of their pleasure from filibustery.