Sharpe’s Bizarre Blade Bazaar Item #291h: “Sad Spathaphone”
Price: 341 sols

This brass beauty is not just a keen blade, oh no: it’s also a tool of psychological warfare! That’s right, the valves and openings on the side are not just for show, and the replaceable reeds are not simple set dressing. Rather, every time you swing this blade, it will loudly, and automatically, play a devastatingly sad soulful saxophone solo. Watch your enemies stop in mid-attack as they are suddenly struck with bouts of melancholy, wistful longing, or bitter ennui. This allows either a genuine human connection, a hand of mercy proffered across the abyss of war and death, or an attack of opportunity.

Billao’s Note:
It crushes your enemies, just not in the way that most people mean.

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