“Okay, I give,” said Harris. “Why do you call your neighbor’s produce vampire cabbages? The Ghost Squad™ has been over them with a PSImeter, and infrared mass spectrometer, and a holy water vaporizer, and there have been no results. To say the State Department of Supernatural Botany is displeased would be an understatement.”

“Oh no, you have it all wrong, Inspector,” said Baron Vladislav von Blüt. “I said his cabbages were vampires because they suck.”

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