July 19, 2017
“The mega-pigeon! The mega-pigeon! The mega-pigeon returns!”
The birds fluttered about excitedly. Surely, the long-vanished mega-pigeon, largest and strongest of pigeon-kind, would lead them back from the brink of destruction.
A dodo emerged from the summoning circle. “Hey there!” it said. “How’s it going?”
July 17, 2017
“Tell me,” Schmidt said. “How did you get your automatic car to drive itself so well?”
“That’s for me to know,” Ellen said. “And you not to know.”
She returned to the garage where the Silver Torpedo was sitting idle. Opening the control panel, she revealed a pigeon strapped in to an old pigeon-guided bomb control.
“Mommy’s little chickie did good today,” she cooed. “Who wants some nummy seeds, huh?”
Excerpts From Nonexistent Books 