“Okay, you’ve got your height?” Clarissa said.

“Five foot one.” Linda said from the doorway where the ruler was still balanced

“We’ll put five three,” Clarissa said. “Heels count.”

“Are you sure about that?” Linda approached the laptop, concerned.

“It’s internet dating,” said Clarissa. “Everyone expects you to lie a little.”

“If you say so.”

“And I do. Right. Body type is next.”

“Can I just put my BMI?” Linda said. “It’s 27.2. They made me calculate it in health class a few weeks ago.”

Clarissa squinted at the screen. “No, you have to choose a descriptor from a drop-down menu. Take a look.”

They both leaned in to read the list of approved terms:

Thin
Athletic
Average
A Little Extra
Ample
BBW
Big Boned
Buxom
Cuddly
Curvy
Fluffy
Full Figured
Generously Proportioned
Healthfully Big
Husky
More Of Me To Love
Natural Body Type
Nontraditional
Plentiful
Plus Sized
Plush
Prime Figure
Rotund
Rubenesque
Stocky
Ultra Feminine
Upper BMI
Venus of Willendorf
Voluptuous
Well Built
Zaftig
Overweight
Obese

“Umm…” Linda said. “Did that seem a little…?”

“Yeah,” Clarissa said. “Yeah. You want some carrot sticks? I have some in the fridge.”

“I’ll be in the bathroom for a minute and I’ll meet you there. Don’t forget the prune juice.”

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