One of the other things Benny would do to impress us was give detailed plot summaries of R-rated movies that our parents wouldn’t let us watch. This was predicated on the solid supposition that a parent who put their kid through the rigmarole of Scouting was probably unlikely to be one that let their kids watch Skinemax as soon as they could hold the remote.

It didn’t matter that Benny’s own parents wouldn’t let him watch R-rated movies either. He just made it up as he went along.

Listening to him in the back of a minivan or on a fishing boat, we were enraptured by Benny’s highly intricate stories. Looking back, it’s actually kind of hilarious. He maintained that Total Recall was about a man who dreamed he killed his sister, only to wake up from the dream and have it really be true. Not sure where the gunfights and Mars fit into that, but I for one assumed that it was all stuff Arnold did to try and rescue his sister. Benny also claimed that It, that gold standard for horror for kids of the mid 80’s, was about a secret government program to produce homicidal monster clowns (which sounds about as reasonable as Stephen King’s tale of pandimensional spider shapeshifters, really).