I’m pleasantly surprised, one might even say amused, by your indignant attitude, Captain. Of course Kiaai V’Lzi is too mellifluous a name to have arisen by chance, and a humanoid figure like the one you see before you, strains credulity and probability. Even with the unusual grey skin tone and pointed ears to easily differentiate what you see from humankind, you find yourself unable to conceive of a convergent evolution strong enough to have produced such a comely form.

Of course you are right.

But let me ask you this, Captain. Would you, or your crew, be able to handle a truly alien being? Wouldn’t it terrify you to know something that reflects no light you can see stalks your ship? Something that relies on trace gasses respirated through a chemical process you cannot conceive? Something that has the repeated patterns that make up its thought made up of such potent electromagnetic energy that it can reprogram what you see and feel as easily as it can annihilate you with a dose of hard rads at a whim?

I know what I’m doing. So do the both of us a favor and let the illusion do its work, eh? You do your thing, I do mine, and we’ll both be safe and snug in the knowledge that you won’t be too terrified or disgusted to do what we need you to do. Okay?

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