“I’d like the billboard to read ‘Southern Michigan University: Home of MAC Champions’ with a picture of one of the SMU Fighting Grizzlies from each of the most popular teams. You know, football, baseball, basketball. Have one of them be a woman, but don’t put one of those girly sports like field hockey up there unless you want to get ready to clean out your desk.”

“But sir, the Fighting Grizzlies haven’t won a national championship since 1977, and even that was just the track and field team which was disbanded in 2003. Other than that, the only thing we have that’s close to a Mid-American Conference champion is the 1966 team. And they lost to the champion, with only that big cash-for-amateur-athletes scandal at the champion’s school leading to their championship being voided 10 years later.”

“A championship is a championship.”

“Fine, but how can we justify such a misleading billboard?”

“How many members of the Southern Michigan University Championship Team from 1966 still live in Hopewell?”

“I’m pretty sure most of them are dead, but I think Bill McAllister is at one of our nursing homes with senile dementia, and I know that even though they lived their entire lives elsewhere, two more players are buried at Hopewell Cemetery.”

“Perfect! That’s good enough. Have a galley of that advertisement for the billboard on my desk by Friday.”

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