Gaggle Inc., the lovable worldwide data hyper-monopoly and purveyor of the acclaimed Gaggle Glaze™ wearable privacy invasion and multiblogging tool, is pleased to announce yet another product in its portfolio. Beginning June 1, interested consumers can sign up for beta access to Gaggle Chaos™.

“We have based our products around organization, traditionally,” said Gaggle Inc. president Mushu Kanihara. “From Gaggle Datebook™ to the Gaggle Metronome™ web browser, we have dedicated ourselves with monklike devotion to the concept of organizing and indexing all human knowledge and information. But sometimes, organization is the last thing you need. And that’s where Gaggle Chaos™ comes in.”

Promoted as the first “disorganization and entropy tool” for a mass-market audience, Gaggle Chaos™ will randomly delete and send emails or text messages, shuffle appointments in Gaggle Datebook™, produce thought-altering tones and radiation for Gaggle Glaze™ users, and a host of other effects that will be implemented at random, in secret. When asked if consumer really want this level of chaos in their lives, Kanihara laughed. “Did anyone know they wanted Gaggle Glaze™ before we made it?” he asked.

Consumer worries about Gaggle Chaos have been assuaged somewhat by the knowledge that the product will mostly likely be quietly abandoned like 90% of Gaggle’s initiatives, or have the plug violently pulled on it despite an active userbase like Gaggle Browser™.

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